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Parenting

Curious kids Or parents at test 😲 -Part 14 (Social acceptance norms & Measurements on Daru ki bottle)

Now my son had entered preliminary school. He was known to be very talkative and naughty kid. One day I received a call from his school. His teacher told me that he disturbed the class. He intentially gives attention seeking answers. I aksed her what was the matter. She narrated the following incident.

She was  a Maths teacher. She was teaching the class about units of measurement. While teaching she had asked the class if they had ever noticed the measurements like 1 kg, 500 grams or 1 litre written on certain packed items. My son had promptly replied, “Yes, on “Daru ki bottle”. After this answer there was ruckus in the class. Kids started laughing, clapping and lot of time had lost in bringing the class under control. I assured the teacher that I would speak to my son.

I was also surprised by this answer. Of all things “Daru ki bottle” was a bit too much. All of us are teetotalers.  Even most of our acquaintances are likewise. I don’t even remember going to any party with my kid where alcohol was served. I spoke to my husband. Even he seemed clueless. It appeared that we would have to speak to our son directly to know the secret. We had to be very careful. In the evening I asked him casually.

Me: These days whats up at school? What new topic are they teaching these days?

After couple of other topics he reached “Units of Measurement” I immediately caught the thread. And asked him where all he had seen measurements written?? He mentioned couple of items and then mentioned “Daru ki bottle”

Me: Daru ki bottle? Where have you seen “Daru ki bottle”? We don’t consume it.

Son: Arre Mamma, yesterday I was coming home with Daddy from day care. On the road I stumbled upon Daru ki bottle. So when teacher asked where you had seen measurements before I remembered that bottle.

Me: Oh! It’s ok. But how did you know that it was indeed a “Daru ki bottle”?

Son: Because of it’s shape.

He traced the peculiar shape of liquor bottles in the air.

Me: How do you know that Daru ki bottle has this peculiar shape??

Son: Teachers!

Me: Teachers?? What do you mean by teachers?? Teacher told you it is liquor bottle??

Son: No Mamma, hoarding! It’s the hoarding!!

Me: Will you please tell me what are you blabbering??

Son: There is that big hoarding on way to school, you remember?

Me: Yes, what of that?

Son: Mamma, that hoarding has big ad of Teacher’s!!

Finally it dawned on me. The hoarding had big advertisement of famous liquor brand – Teacher’s Highland Cream. 

This is how my son had deduced bottle he had stumbled upon was “Daru ki bottle”. I was aghast.  After listening to this I had no heart of telling off my kid about the teacher’s complaint. I just decided to let go off the incident. When he will grow he will automatically understand the difference between what is socially acceptable and what is not!! Till then the answer that the measurement is written on “Daru ki bottle” holds good for me. What about you??

My limited point in this incident is don’t just get panicked by complaints from school. Nor scold the child without having meaningful dialogue. Have faith in your upbringing as well as have faith in your kid. Give him opportunity to explain himself. 

For reading other blogs please click on https://kinfolkclub.com or https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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General Topic

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 9 (Nurturing reading habit)

In my last blog we just saw how my kiddo started handling encyclepedia since the age of 2 years and how reading hour became our favorite pastime.

Slowly this picture watching game converted into question answer sessions. Now instead of merely reciting captions of the pictures my kiddo started asking “Mamma, what is nebula??” “What do you mean by tornado” “what does this train do?” 

Being a commerce student I didn’t know answers to many of his questions. But I would typically read the information from the encyclepedia and tell the same to my kiddo in easy language. If that was not sufficient I would google or would ask someone.

Gradually my kiddo started telling stories of nebulas, hurricanes, earthquakes, volcanoes, solar system, trains to all of us. 

Me and my kiddo were regular visitors to the books fairs and book shops. In one of such fairs I found one more trove of treasure – it was a set of books with names “From oil to petrol”, “From milk to cheese” “From shoot to apple” and “From wheat to bread”. They were very small books of around 25 pages consisting of good illustrations and short description in 1-2 sentences about the process. These books were the turning point. The teacher had just started teaching different types of words with phonetics in school. But my kiddo had enjoyed these books so much that he attempted to read these books on his own. From Oil to Petrol was the first ever book my kiddo read independently. Wherever he would stumble he would ask “how to read this word Mamma?” Eventually he started reading even complicated words. Soon he started reading all the books.

Considering his liking we amassed encyclopedia on various topics like Mighty machines, Space, Mother Earth, Oceans, Human Body, Explorers tales, Backyard Scientist over a period of time. He was crazy about Titanic. So we collected many books and stories on Titanic. 1001 days which changed the history of the world was his another favorite. In school he came across Gerenimo Stilton. This is the only fiction where my kiddo was attracted. So we had Gerenimo Stilton series books as well.

From our journey all I am trying to suggest is try to judge the inclination of your kid and try to collect books accordingly. Your kid may like fiction or fairy tales or comics or superheroes or adventures. Give them what they like. It is just possible that your kid may not like reading at all. But what’s the harm in trying??

In my previous blog we read the first mantra that was to start early and spend quality time with your kid. My second mantra is judge the inclination of your kid and try to collect books on topics your kid enjoys the most. Do not rely entirely on the typical books available books meant for kids. My third mantra is when we are starting the books from early age concentrate on attractiveness of illustrations rather than written content. Correctness of written content needs to be ensured. But little kids get attracted by attractive pictures rather than written content. Initially books with attractive illustrations and brief information are sufficient.

Today is a digital age and mobiles and internet videos are in vogue. Read my next blog to find out whether invasions by mobiles and internet on books were successful.

To read my other blogs visit www.kinfolkclub.com or

https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 8 (Inculcating reading habit in kids)

Many times we hear parents complaining to each other that their kids do not read books. They have got so many books but their kids are not ready to look at them. Here I have one question for parents – do you read books?? Do you read with your kid??

Today I will share with you how our journey of reading began. Our kiddo was around 1.5- 2 years old. We had typical picture books of animals, vehicles, vegetables etc. My kiddo used to enjoy vehicle pictures the most. 

One afternoon one salesman rang the bell. He was selling encyclepedia named “Ask Me Anything” The book had very nice, colorful and attractive illustrations and brief description. I liked the encyclepedia very much and purchased the same thinking that one day my kiddo would grow and read the same!

All my family members thought that the kiddo  was too young to read the book. Even I agreed with him. Anyways I kept the book on the center table in hall and went inside for my work. 

After some time my kiddo went into the hall. Something red and silver on the center table caught his attention. He tried to lift it but it was too heavy for him. He opened the red and silver book and started turning pages. Ohh!! There were lots of pictures in this book. When I came into the hall my little one was already engrossed in turning the pages and watching new pictures. When he saw me he came running to me and dragged me near the book. He told me to show the pictures in this new book.

I sat cross legged on the floor and he sat comfortably in my lap spreading the new picture book. We started flipping pages of encyclepedia. When he used to find something interesting he would simply ask “what is this?” I used to tell him the name of the object.

Slowly Helix nebula, cartwheel nebula, tornado, hurricane, volcanoes, maglev and fernicular trains, solar system, milky way and Andromeda galaxies became our favorite pictures. The ease with which other children could narrate names of various fruits, vegetables, animals my kiddo would recite the names of various nebulas, stars, planets, trains.

Every day when I used to come back from office first we would have our dinner and then he would sit in my lap and we would see various pictures in encyclepedia. My kiddo was immensely enjoying this new picture book. When I used to go to office kiddo would show various pictures to his Dada and Dadi. Even they were amazed by how easily the kiddo had grasped knowledge about so many things. 

You may wonder being a working mother how did I manage to spend so much of time with kiddo. Where there is will there is a way. I will share my secret with you. Firstly I appointed maids for cooking, cleaning etc. So very little was left for me to do. Plus my support system consisting of in laws was very strong.

Secondly for me it was strict “No No to TV” Others would watch TV. But me and kiddo would occupy our bedroom typically he sitting in my lap and having “Ask me anything” as our constant companion. I believe that this is the age when the kids require parents the most. Once they grow up the nest would be empty. Sometimes I used to be tired after busy day. But I rarely said “No” to our reading time. Spending this quality time had done all the wonders. It may not be possible for all to implement same ideas. Have it your own way.. but spending quality time with kids is very important.

The book which I had purchased with assumption that one day my kiddo will read this book had become hit on day one itself. My unintentional shopping had done wonders!!

Friends, “start early and spend quality time free from any kind of gadgets” is my mantra. We have seen the beginning of the reading hobby in this part. In next blog we will see how this hobby was further nurtured. Stay tuned!!

You can read all the blogs on https://kinfolkclub.com or

https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test😲-Part 6 (Rendezvous with the Thalaiva)

In last blog we read about how my kiddo witnessed baby delivery scene in the “Robot” movie accidentally and how the little one asked questions on delivery.

My little question bank was of course not done with what he had witnessed on the TV. Pat came the next question.

Kiddo: Mamma, do women die while giving birth to the baby??

Me (emphatically): Of course not.

Kiddo: Then why did she say – she is dying??

Me: Women do not die while delivering babies. In some very very rare case due to some complications a woman may die.

Kiddo: But that woman on the TV died…

Me: Not at all dear. On the contrary that woman was saved. 

Kiddo: Then why did she say she is dying??

Me: That doctor thought that if the complications were not solved immediately the woman’s life was in danger. But that woman was saved. Plus, this is movie. So people don’t really die in movie. They just act like that.

Kiddo: Act means??

Me: Nattak…(Drama)! They just pretend to die.

Kiddo: But why did she say she is dying even in drama??

It was clear that he was very much shaken by that scene and he was not able to take this question out of his head whatever I answered. So I tried to give him some real life examples.

Me: Look I gave you birth and I am still there. Right??

Kiddo: Yes, but she said..

I cut him short and said

Me: Look at Dadi. She gave birth to Bua and Daddy. Both were normal deliveries. She is still there and she adores you. Doesn’t she?

Kiddo: Yes, but…

Me: Look at Nani.. she gave birth to Mamma and Mausi. She is still alive and gets lots of toys for you.

I had to give him many such examples of Buas, Mausis, Mamis, grannies… Finally the truth dawned on him and he got convinced. The Thalaiva Rajanikant has inspired many people in many ways but he has inspired my kiddo to ask endless questions!!

You may also feel why am I entertaining my kid so much?? Is it really necessary to discuss these things in this much detail?? I feel that these days the kids have a lot of exposure compared to what we had in our time. In the given instance itself my kid had accidentally stumbled across this delivery scene and was shaken. It was very much necessary to remove his anxiety. With this kind of exposure I think these kinds of conversations are unavoidable.

Secondly these days they have lot of avenues of getting information like Internet, encyclepedia, books. If we do not satisfy their curiosity then there are high chances that they will turn to these other media. Imagine what sort of material will be available to them!! Instead it’s better we give them sensored information. Let them hear what you want them to hear.

Lastly let them build confidence that they get right answers to all sort of questions from their parents. Let them turn to you instead of their friends or seniors. Curiosity is not a sin. Then why kill it? Try them with correct information and you will be surprised by their amazing capacity. 

Friends, let’s meet again next week with story about amazing grasping power of kids. Sometimes when we say he is just a kid and avoid anwer his questions probably we are underestimating them. Stay tuned!!

You can read all the blogs by the author on 

https://Kinfolkclub.com or https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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Parenting

Curious Kids Or Parents At Test 😲- Part 4 (How Baby Goes In?)

My kiddo was around three and half year old. My sister in law (SIL)’s was pregnant and her delivery was due in December sometime. So she had come to Mumbai for her delivery. It was my Kiddo’s first encounter with the pregnancy. He saw all preparations in full swing for arrival of new guest- clothes, craddle, special food items. He saw the big baby bump his Bua was sporting. One evening his Bua called him and put his small hands on her belly. He could feel tiny movements from within. He was all excited. He was telling one and all about baby in Bua’s belly.

In couple of hours the excitement waned and curiosity peeped in. At sleeping time he came closer to me and called me in a confidential tone, “Mammaaaa….” By now I had learnt to distinguish this special tone. Immediately my mind went into “attention” mode. I tried to keep my tone casual and said, “yes beta??”

Kiddo: Mammaaaa how did the baby go into Bua’s belly??

I was dumbstruck. Now how to answer him?? I had dreaded this question since arrival of my SIL and that dreaded moment had now arrived. Still I had not reached the solution. I thought for a while and finally said-
Me: Beta the baby did not go in but it was formed there.

I could see that he was not really convinced by my answer but he didn’t ask anything further. I also maintained the silence.

Since he had not received satisfactory answer he started thinking on his own. Next night when we were alone he asked me, “Mammaaaa, did Bua swallow the baby??” (He seemed disgusted with his own idea)

Me (shocked): Nooo!!!

He seemed relieved. At least Bua had not swallowed the baby.

Kiddo: Then did the baby enter inside through Bua’s nose??

Me (helpless): Nooo Beta.

Kiddo: Then the baby must have entered through Bua’s belly button for sure..

Me (exasperated): No, no, no Beta. The baby was formed inside mother’s womb.

He was exploring all holes in the body and trying to figure out whether the baby had entered Bua’s belly through that route.

His eyes were still telling me that he was not convinced with the answer. For the first time his Mamma had failed him!

Next day when I got back from office my kiddo came to me bursting with excitement. I finally found out how baby got inside. Now it was my turn to ask him.

Me: how??

Kiddo: Dadi told me that when all of us were sleeping the God placed the baby inside Bua by magic. She had prayed for the baby.

Me: Is it??

Hmm.. since his Mamma had failed to answer his query he had naturally turned to his next best resource Dadi for answers.

I was not happy the way this quest had ended. But all the same I felt relieved that now I need not answer this question for some time.

Finally after few months I found a book named “Where do babies come from?” The book is specially meant for quenching thirst of small ones. Nice illustrations, to the point information and absolutely decent language. It explains general reproduction cycle first for plants, then for birds, then for cats and finally for humans. Must have book! I showed the book to my kiddo. 

In nutshell I told him Daddy has a sperm and Mamma has an egg (no, this is not like chicken egg we eat!! Mamma cannot take out her egg. It’s there in her ovaries. I had to show my kiddo the position of ovaries..phew..) The egg joins the sperm to make a tiny baby inside Mamma’s womb. Slowly tiny legs grow, tiny hands grow, head and eyes grow. Simultaneously other organs like heart, lungs are formed. It takes around 9 months for a baby to grow. When baby grows fully the Doctor takes out the baby by doing small operation (I didn’t dare mention normal delivery yet). 

Though Kiddo’s quest had ended with Dadi’s simple explanation Mamma’s urge to give correct information had not ended. Mamma’s quest ended only when she gave correct explanation to the kiddo.

As a mother I always believed that we should try to give factually correct answers to our kids. We need not elaborate on not-so-required details. But try to stick to the facts. At least do not give incorrect explanations. At times I prefer to tell my kid that Mamma does not know the answer. But she will find it and come back. And yes majority of the times it works. It works because Mamma comes back with the answers!!

Friends how did you like today’s blog?? Let’s meet again and explore my kiddo’s first rendezvous with the original “Thalaiva” Rajanikant.

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲 -Part 3

For reading part 2 click on below link

Curious kids or parents at test 😲 -Part 2 (Dadi wouldn’t let me put ink on stickers)

In previous part we read about my Kiddo’s complaint about Dadi that she was not letting him put ink on the stickers and my mother in law’s (MIL) odd questions about place of keeping sanitary napkins. I was still trying to keep my patience and tried to assure my MIL that I don’t leave such things in open in my cupboard. She sat quietly on the edge of the bed. Finally I opened my cupboard and showed her that the packet was nicely kept in embroidered pink bag and the bag was placed safely in upper drawer.She heaved a sigh and started narrating the events of the afternoon. She was in the kitchen preparing tea. Kiddo managed to escape Dadi’s attention and went into the bedroom. I don’t know why but my kiddo had always found Mamma’s cupboard to be a trove of treasure. Not only then but even now also he doesn’t miss opportunity to peep into Mamma’s cupboard.So he managed to open my cupboard. Lower shelves were packed with clothes. He climbed on the second shelf by resting his feet on the lower shelves and caught hold of embroidered pink purse. He found some napkins exactly similar to those he had seen in the advertisement. By Jove! They were not just napkins but they were stickers!! He removed the adhesive papers in hurry and stuck 5-6 stickers on our bed. He was really pleased with his own act. But he was not satisfied with this. He wanted something more.He was trying to find something in Daddy’s study when my MIL realised that all was quiet and she had not heard my kiddo for some time. Silence is always sign of danger when you have small kids in the house. She rushed out of kitchen and saw my kiddo struggling to remove something from his father’s cabinet. It was the ink bottle! My kiddo demanded the ink bottle when he saw Dadi around. She asked him, “But why you need ink bottle??” My kiddo dragged his Dadi to our bedroom excitedly. He pointed at our bed and said excitedly, “Dadi look. I have got stickers and I want to pour ink on these stickers exactly the way they show on TV” My MIL was aghast looking at the sight in my bedroom. The kiddo had spread his stickers aka sanitary napkins across the bed and affixed them to the bedsheet.My MIL was in a fix. She refused to give him ink bottle point blank. Dadi had removed his precious stickers and had thrown them in the dustbin. What else my poor darling could have done other than complaining to his Mamma, “Dadi wouldn’t let me put ink on the stickers”Friends how did you like my blog?? Follow my blog to know about what happens when my Kiddo met his pregnant Bua!!