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Parenting

What you sow comes back to you 😄

Now my kiddo had entered primary school. He was learning new new things – formally from his school and informally from his friends. That day he had learnt new thing from his  friends was eating chewing gums. Now he was insisting on buying a packet of chewing gums. He knew that I didn’t approve of eating chewing gums. So he smartly approached his father and demanded chewing gums. 

My husband also didn’t much approve of chewing gums. But he also knew that banning it completely would not help. So he got a packet of chewing gums and insisted  on eating it under his supervision. Our son had never eaten chewing gum till then. My son was more than glad in complying with his Daddy’s directions. 

Now the next challenge was how to stop him from getting into this habit?? Now our son was a big boy and would not yield to our wishes unless he would be convinced about it. If we would have tried to convince him he would have felt that since both of us hate chewing gums we are simply trying to keep him away from it. We wanted some impartial judge. And here came our ally. The Internet!!

You will find information about anything you want. You need to just word your search phrase appropriately. After our son had his first chewing gum my husband gave search on the Internet “Disadvantages of eating chewing gums” Of course internet provided lots of information on disadvantages ranging from tooth decay to kidney problems to cancer. My son read these articles. He also found out that the chewing gums may contain controversial ingredients like Butylated Hydroxytoluene, Titanium Dioxide, Aspartame which if consumed in excess quantities may lead to cancer, metabolic disorders, head aches. Immediately he checked his own packet. He found one of such controlversial ingredients in his chewing gum. He immediately threw his remaining packet in dustbin. We were relieved by this action.

My husband and myself proceeded for doing night time chores and our son continued browsing internet. After some time he called both us. He told his father, “Daddy, these days you use too much of WhatsApp”

During that period my husband was working as coordinator and was using WhatsApp to a great extent for this coordination job.

Husband: Of course, I need to use it for work.

Son: But it is not good for you at all 

Husband: Means?

My son had googled on “Side effects of using WhatsApp” and he was showing some article where the author had mentioned extreme consequences of using WhatsApp. The author had mentioned that one may lose the eyesight by excessive use of WhatsApp!! I burst into laughing. My husband’s face was worth watching.  My kiddo was looking at both of us with a big question mark on his face. He was unable to understand why the elders were not taking such dire consequences seriously.

Afterall what you sow comes back to you!!

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Parenting

Happy boy who forgot to flush

Now the days of “हम दो हमारे दो” are over. These days most of the couples have single kids. Single kids who are greatly pampered, who get the best of everything and are yet unsatisfied. Many times they are very argumentative. Parent have to literally pursuade their kids to do small things. Kids don’t listen and the overall environment of the house gets heated.

For some time we were trying to teach our son that whenever he uses a bathroom he was supposed to flush and keep the bathroom clean. Sometimes he used to flush and sometimes he used to forget. There was no particular reason behind either forgetting or remembering. We were tired of constantly reminding and checking. He was not leaving his casual attitude behind. Persuasion, scolding, punishment all modes tried but in vain. One day my husband had a brain wave and he started narrating a story of a happy boy to our son.

“Once upon a time there lived a boy. He used to be happy at all times. He used to be happy during day, he used to be happy during night. He used to be very happy while brushing and doing potty also. His happiness knew no bounds.

In the fit of his happiness he used to do many crazy things. For example when he used to take bath he would sing and then leave wet towel on the bed. While going out he would change into new clothes and in the fit of happiness leave used clothes on the floor. When he used to come back from school he would leave his shoes and socks scattered in the room. He would throw his school bag on the sofa. But he used to be happiest when he used to go for potty. He would sing songs and then forget to flush. He used to be so happy, so happy that he used to turn deaf when people were calling his name. He simply would not respond to his Mum or Dad calling.”

My son was staring at my husband with mouth wide open. When my husband finished telling his story he just rushed into the bathroom and flushed the toilet. He came back and asked my husband, “Daddy, you are telling my story, aren’t you?” My husband didn’t reply. He was just smiling. 

This story proved to be a game changer. The term “Happy Boy” became sort of code word for us. The moment we would say today you seem to be very happy he would run around the house and check what he had done rather I would say what he had omitted to do. Earlier when we used to have guests and he used to forget to flush we used to feel embarrassed while telling our son. But now we would just say “Happy boy” and immediately my son would pick up the hint and do the needful. All shouting business had reduced considerably. No pursuasion was necessary. Absolutely no embarrassment in front of guests. Overall environment became calm and pleasant. After all these years now my kid is trained and desciplined. But for occasional rare lapses the story of a happy boy comes handy.

Friends, I agree that this was not a planned and calculated trick. But I am sharing this experience to demonstrate that we need to be creative while dealing with our kids. Mere shouting and punishing does not help. This cannot be the readymade solution as every kid is different and different things would inspire different people. Just think what would inspire your own kid and try something new. When you get frustrated just remember that there was a happy boy who would forget to flush!

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Parenting

मुलांच कुतूहल की पालकांची परीक्षा – भाग १ (उड्डाणपूलाची आणि पवनचक्कीची गोष्ट)

मी ११ वर्षांची आई आहे… अहो कसलाही गैरसमज करून घेऊ नका. मला फक्त इतकंच म्हणायचं आहे की मी ११ वर्षाच्या मुलाची आई आहे. तेही अत्यंत जिज्ञासू पण तितक्याच खोडकर मुलाची आई आहे. आज मी तुम्हाला पण माझ्या पालकत्वाच्या प्रवासामध्ये सहभागी करून घेणार आहे. असा प्रवास जो अखंड प्रश्र्न मालिकेने भरला आहे, असा प्रवास ज्यामध्ये आई मुलाच्या प्रश्र्नांची उत्तरं द्यावीत की नाही अशा संभ्रमात पडते, उत्तरं द्यायची तर कशी या विचारात पडते, असा प्रवास जो मुलाचा कुतुहलाचा झरा अखंड वाहता रहावा यासाठी केलेल्या प्रयत्नांनी भरला आहे.

माझ्या गोष्टी सांगायच्या प्रवासाला तेव्हा सुरूवात झाली जेव्हा माझा मुलगा बोलायला लागला आणि त्याने प्रश्र्न विचारयला सुरूवात केली. आधी त्याचे प्रश्र्न “आई, हे काय आहे?” “ते काय आहे?” पर्यंत सिमीत होते. मीही आपण आपल्या मुलाचं कुतूहल मारता कामा नये अशा आधुनिक विचारांची आई असल्यामुळे त्याच्या प्रश्र्नांची यथाशक्ती उत्तरं देत गेले. 

तो छोट्या मुलांसाठी असणार्या काऊ चिऊच्या गोष्टींमध्ये कधीच रमला नाही. कदाचित तो अशा गोष्टींचा त्यांच्या अनुभव विश्वाशी मेळ घालू शकत नसेल. तो त्याच्या आजूबाजूला दिसणाऱ्या सामान्य गोष्टींकडे बोट दाखवायचा आणि आई मला याची गोष्ट सांग असं म्हणायचा. त्याला प्रत्येक वस्तूची गोष्ट हवी असायची. आज मी तुम्हाला अशाच काही गोष्टी सांगणार आहे.

एकदा आम्ही कारमधून चाललो असताना त्याने बाहेर बोट दाखवलं आणि “आई, मला या उड्डाणपूलाची गोष्ट सांग” म्हणून माझ्या पाठीमागे लागला. मीही विचारात पडले की आता उड्डाणपूलाची काय गोष्ट सांगणार. मी थोडा विचार केला आणि त्याला गोष्ट सांगायला सुरुवात केली.
आपल्याला एका ठिकाणापासून दुसऱ्या ठिकाणी जाण्यासाठी तयार केलेल्या वाटेला रस्ता म्हणतात. जिथे दोन रस्ते एकमेकांना छेदतात अशा ठिकाणी पूल बांधून एक रस्ता दुसऱ्या रस्त्यावरून नेलेला असतो त्याला उड्डाणपूल असं म्हणतात. आणि वाहनांसाठी किंवा चालणाऱ्या लोकांसाठी एका रस्त्याखालून दुसरा रस्ता बांधतात त्याला भुयारी मार्ग म्हणतात. मग उड्डाणपूल कधी वापरतात, भुयारी मार्गाचा उपयोग काय अशी आमची गोष्ट चालू राहिली. मी या गोष्टीबद्दल साशंक होते पण गोष्ट संपली तेव्हा त्याच्या चेह-यावर मात्र समाधान दिसत होतं. 

असंच एकदा पुण्याला जात असताना आम्हाला पवनचक्की दिसली. लगेचच आमची प्रश्र्नमालिका चालू झाली.
छोटुकला: आई, हे गोल गोल काय फिरतय?

मी: अरे त्याला पवनचक्की असं म्हणतात.

छोटुकला: आई, मला त्या पवनचक्कीची गोष्ट सांग.

मी: एकदा एक टाटा काका होते. त्यांना एका टेकडीवर नेहमी जोराचा वारा वाहताना दिसायचा. त्यांनी त्या वाऱ्याचा वापर करून वीज तयार करायची ठरवली. मग काय! त्यांनी एक पवनचक्कीच उभी केली. जेव्हा जोराचा वारा वाहतो तेव्हा त्या वाऱ्यामुळे पवनचक्कीची पाती गोल गोल फिरतात. त्या पात्यामधल्या ऊर्जेच जनित्र (generator) वीजेमध्ये रुपांतर करतात. तयार झालेली वीज तारांमधून इतर ठिकाणी वाहून नेली जाते. (मी त्याला विजेच्या तारा आणि खांब दाखवले.) या तारे मधूनच वीज आपल्या घरापर्यंत येऊन पोहोचते. आता तू सांग बरं आपल्या घरी कोणती कोणती उपकरणं विजेवर चालतात??

छोटुकला: दिवा, पंखा…

मी: अजून??

छोटुकला: अंमऽऽ फ्रीज, गिझर, मिक्सर

मी: एकदम बरोबर!!

माझी गोष्ट संपताना पिल्लूचे डोळे आनंदाने चमकत होते. मला गोष्ट सांगायच्या आधी त्याला ती समजेल की नाही अशी शंका वाटत होती. पण त्याला ती गोष्ट नुसतीच समजली नाही तर ती त्याच्या पसंतीला पण उतरली आहे हे त्याचे डोळेच सांगत होते.
काही दिवसांतच आम्ही त्याला गोष्टी सांगण्याच्या कलेमध्ये प्रभुत्व मिळवलं. अशाच प्रकारे आमच्या कितीतरी गोष्टी तयार झाल्या… खुर्चीच्या, टेबलच्या, आगगाडीच्या, क्रेनच्या, कॉंक्रीट मिक्सरच्या… या गोष्टी बहुतेक वेळेला तो पदार्थ किंवा वस्तू कशापासून बनली आहे, तिचा उपयोग कुठे होतो, ती वस्तू कशी चालते अशा मुद्यांना धरून तयार व्हायच्या.

तुम्हाला पण तुमच्या छोटुकल्यांबरोबर असे अनुभव आले असतील ना? तुमच्या पण घरामध्ये अशीच न थोपवता येणारी प्रश्र्न मालिका असेल ना?? माझी खात्री आहे की तुम्हाला तुमच्या छोटुकल्यांच्या झंझावाताला उत्तरं देताना हा लेख निश्चित मार्गदर्शक ठरेल. मलाही तुमचे अनुभव ऐकायला नक्की आवडेल. अशाच तुमच्या माझ्या जिव्हाळ्याच्या गोष्टी, अनुभव ऐकण्यासाठी माझी लेखमाला फाॅलो करा.. माझे इतर लेख (इंग्रजी आणि मराठी) वाचण्यासाठी पुढील सांकेतिक स्थळांना भेट द्या: 
https://kinfolkclub.com किंवा https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 21 (Why you use sanitary napkin)- Part 2

To read first part click on Part 1

In last blog we read that my son insisting on clarification on why I need to use sanitary napkins. My excuses for not telling him giving him reason were exhausting. Finally I gave in. Explaining menstrual cycle to 10 year old was a challenge. 

Me: Before we actually turn to why I use sanitary napkin I want to ask you few questions. Suppose we are looking for a new house, will you choose place where electricity, water facilities available or you will go and  start living in house where nothing is available and then start preparing bathroom and fit electric fittings??

Son: I will choose a house which has water and electricity.

Me: Means we first ensure that all facilities are available in the house before we start living there, right? The house needs to be maintained in “ready” mode. One does not know when someone will start living there. 

Likewise, the nature has designed our bodies considering the future needs or functions of the body. Who conceives the baby??

Son: Girl or woman.

Me: Correct. So woman’s body is specially designed to carry a baby in her womb or uterus. The nature keeps a woman’s body in “ready” condition before baby is ever  conceived. It doesn’t know when a baby will come there.  

Now once again I will ask you a question. What do we do if we do not require something in the house?

Son: We give it to someone else or we throw it if it is not usable.

Me: Right! Using the same analogy now tell me what does our body do with something that’s not required? For example what does our body do with undigested food?

Son: Throw it out by way of potty or may be urine??

Me: Correct. Now let’s go back to our main topic. Woman have an organ called ovaries which are part of our reproduction system. Every month the ovaries release an egg. The egg can fertilize only if it meets a gene from father. At the same time a thick lining/ layer is formed in uterus so that fertilized egg, if any, can grow there. If the egg does not meet father’s gene then the egg will not fertilize. Now you tell me if there is no frtilized egg will our body require thick lining?

Son: No.

Me: If our body does not require thick lining what will our body do??

Son: Ummm.. throw it out??

Me: Yep. Exactly that’s what happens every month with women. When the uterus doesn’t find fertilized egg it throws the lining which is not required and when it is thrown out we don’t have any control over it and we need to use sanitary napkins. It happens once every month. Each cycle lasts for around 4-6 days.

After all this explanation my son’s mouth was wide open. All be could say was, “Mamma don’t ever tell me such bloody stories again” 

Me: If you are going to ask me bloody questions then you are going to get bloody answers. Mamma tried to tell you that you are still you are young and need to wait for 1-2 years. She was trying to pursuade you again and again. But you didn’t listen. So you deserve them!!

Epilogue: My son got the answer for query. But after learning the answer he was somewhat shocked. It was not very pleasant conversation for him. With this dialogue he learnt one important lesson that if his mother asks him to wait for getting answers to certain questions then she has some genuine reasons and not because she does not want to answer. From then on he thinks carefully before asking questions. If I ask him to wait he shows patience! Isn’t that a big relief for mother of a curious kid?

To read other blogs visit https://kinfolkclub.com or 

https://motherlab.blogspot.com

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 20 (Mamma, why you use sanitary napkin) – Part 1

When I was kid and I used to ask any awkward questions to my mother I used to get only one answer, ” You will get to know automatically when you grow.” No persuasion would work on her. Perhaps we had very limited exposure and she was not too much worried that we would turn elsewhere to get information. This “elsewhere” was limited to books or friends.

Now time has changed. Kids are too much exposed to media and internet. So the kind of answers my mother used to give me are not sufficient. Modern mothers are constantly under pressure of information explosion.

When my son was very young, one day after watching the advertisement he had asked me what sanitary napkins were. I had told him then that they are special kind of diapers meant for ladies. He was ok with this answer for many years.

Then he entered in 4th standard. One day he saw me going into the bathroom with sanitary napkins in my hands. When I came back from bathroom he had scandalized look on his face. He asked me, “Why you need to use these  napkins??”

Me: Sometimes I simply need them..

Son: But why?? Who uses diapers?? Either babies or old people, right??

Me: Yes.

Son: Babies do not understand when they get potty. They cannot control. So they use diapers.. But you are grown up. You do understand when you want go to bathroom or when you get potty. You have control. Then why need to use these napkins.

Me (still avoiding to answer the question): Sometimes ladies need to use them.

Son: How come you have control sometimes and sometimes you don’t??

Me: My dear boy, you need to wait to get this answer for couple of years. You are too young.

Son: No, you have to answer today only. 

Me: I still feel I should answer this question after 1-2 years. The time will probably be right then.

Son: But why I need to wait?? You have always been answering all sorts of questions all these years. This is not the first time I have asked you difficult or awkward question. Then why suddenly you are telling me to wait??

Me: Because I still feel you are young my boy. These things are anyways covered in your syllabus when you enter 8th standard. You are only in 4th standard. So why hurry??

Son: No, no, no. You will have to tell me just now. Why don’t you try me…

These arguments went on for some time. I was slowly running out of all the excuses. My son was not ready to back off at any rate. 

Stay tuned to find out the result of our tussle. Finally who won.. Mamma or son….

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲 -Part 19 (Mamma what is sex??)

My son was in 4th standard. Once me, my husband and our son were going out in an auto. Suddenly my son asked me, “Mamma what do you mean by sex??” This was a bouncer for me though I knew what had prompted this question. 

This was his daily route to school. There was a clinic on this road with big board “SEX PROBLEMS सभी लैंगिक समस्याओ का समाधान” Considering the fact that he is so inquisitive and he is using the same road since last 7 years I will say that he took a long time to ask this question. May be whenever he had this question his Mamma and Daddy were not around. Today there was a board and there were his parents. Ideal situation to ask question. And yes, he fired the question at us, “Mamma, what do you mean by sex?” What a question to discuss in an auto riksha! I am sure though the auto driver’s eyes were on the road his ears were turned to us.

I was thinking and thinking. I was trying to find the words. How can one discuss such topic in auto? Suddenly it was my husband who took charge of the situation. He said, “Oh! It’s quite simple” I was impressed by my husband’s quick wit. Normally it was my department to dwelve into such awkward questions. He continued, “It simply means male or female. Means you are a boy. I am boy. So we are male. Mamma is a girl or a woman. So she is a female” 

I thought it was brilliant. My husband had not told anything wrong. He had told one of the meanings. My son thought for a moment and said, “But Daddy, is gender not more appropriate word for it??” My husband’s face was worth seeing. Now it was his turn to become speechless. But I had picked up the thread. I said, “You are quite right dear. The word sex is used synonymously for word gender. In few of the registration forms people write sex instead of gender” Thankfully my son was satisfied and he turned attention elsewhere. Me and my husband looked at each other and  heaved a sign of relief.

This satisfaction remained only for some time. After couple of months again we happened to take the same route. Again my son asked the same question. This time I was prepared. I immediately started giving the same explanation which his Daddy had given last time. My son said, “I know all this Mamma. But what’s the problem about it? On the board it is written ‘sex problems’. If I am a boy and Mamma is a girl what’s the problem about it?”  I could clearly see that the auto driver was trying to listen our explanation. I was feeling very awkward. I finally told my son that we cannot have this kind of discussion in auto riksha or in public place and he would have to wait till we reach home. He seemed ok with that. He had not remembered the question after reaching home. 

I am still keeping my fingers crossed when my son would ask me the other meanings of the word!

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 18 (Does your kid have access to adult content – Part 4 last)

In last 2 blogs we learnt the reasons behind my son’s acts in the school which made teacher believe that he had access to adult content. I had started breathing easy as my son had been innocent in two out of three incidents. The third incident where my son had licked other boy’s hands was little worrisome. We were not able to understand the logic behind it. And this is where even we had doubts. So we continued with our conversation.

Me: By the way tell me why you were licking hands of Ajay??

Son: Daddy taught me.

Me: Daddy taught you?? (My eyes widened in a shock.) Now from where Daddy has come into the picture??

Son: I learnt it from Daddy and I was trying to teach Ajay..

I was aghast to hear this. I almost shouted

Me: What?? Daddy taught you to lick the hands of other people?? 

Son: Yes. Arre Mamma, that day Daddy was teaching me the trick. He said it was kind of defense technique. If someone grabs you from behind and puts his hands on your mouth so that you cannot shout then Daddy told me to use this trick. You have to simply stick out your tongue. The other person holding you will immediately remove his hand from your mouth or loosen the grip. I showed Ajay the trick. He wanted to learn it. He wanted to use it on me.

My goodness!! I could never have imagined this. So this was the licking business! I heaved a big sigh. Suddenly the world looked brighter.

Thank God!! We bothered to talk to our son calmly rather than shouting. It was most comforting to know that afterall our son didn’t have access to adult content. Finally we were ready for the meeting with teacher. 

When our meeting began the tone of the teacher was little accusatory. She asked us did we really know what our son was doing behind our back. Indeed we did know. We appraised her about the background of all incidents one by one. Now it was her turn to get flabbergasted. She was speechless for some time. She couldn’t believe that there was such simple reasoning possible apart from access to adult content. 

At the end the teacher apologized. We appreciated the fact that his teacher was vigilant about the behavioral aspect of kids along with curriculum. However, she had tried to link non related incidents, she had thought like an adult and drawn conclusions. The kid had thought like a kid and acted like one. I wouldn’t blame her.  Now she knew the truth.

In my earlier blogs also I tried to stress on aspects about difference in the way adults think and children think. We need to recognize this difference. By the time we become parents our mind is already conditioned by society, social norms and adult behavior. Whereas the kids behavior is impulsive and free from social dogma.

Friends, when dealing with kids try to step into the shoes of kids and then try to analyze the situation.  Most importantly have faith in your kid but be cautious at the same time!! Try to have meaningful dialogue. Majority of the problems can be solved by assertive and positive conversations. That’s the secret of having healthy relationship with the ultra modern kids!!

For reading my other blogs please visit 

https://kinfolkclub.com or https://motherlab.blogapot.com

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 17 (Does your kid have access to adult content?- Part 3)

In last blog we saw that how the cartoon had inspired the act of shouting “I love you” rather than any kind of adult content.  Now we wanted to find out more about why he was trying to hug the other boy. So we continued with our dialogue..

Me: Your teacher also told me that you were trying to hug Amit.

Son: What?? I was trying to hug? And that too Amit??

Me: Yes, precisely that’s what teacher said.

Son: No Mamma it was not me. In fact Amit was trying to hug me.

Me: Then why teacher said that you were trying to hug him?

Son: I don’t know. That day the teacher caught us running in the corridor. He was trying to hug me. So I was running.

Me: But why Amit was trying to hug you?

Son: How do I know Mamma? The teacher caught us running in the corridor and she was angry. She was about to scold us. Suddenly Amit told her that I was trying to hug him. I tried to tell teacher that he was lying. But teacher didn’t listen to me.

I tried to probe further in different ways but got the same answers. From whatever conversation we had I was quite convinced that my son was not trying to hug the other boy. Normally parents know when their kids are lying. This was probably one such incident where he was speaking truth. Probably the other kid thought that offence is the best defense. So when teacher found the kids running down the corridor the kid complained to teacher about my son. Since my son was already known to be naughty the teacher didn’t bother to check the truth.

By now I had started breathing little easily. Two out of three instances were down and both the incidents had nothing to do with access to adult content. But what about the third?? First two incidents had sounded little lame from the beginning. Still I didn’t wish to leave anything un-explored. I wanted to be 100% sure that my son was not seeing something he ought not to. The third incident was climax. It had really put me into jitters. This part of the conversation was what I had dreaded the most.

Why was my son licking hands of the other boy? Why indeed?? Please follow my next blog to find the answers.

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Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲 -Part 16 (Does your kid have access to adult content?? – Part 2)

In my last blog we read about my son’s teacher expressing her doubts regarding my son having access to adult content. We decided to have a dialogue with our son. Read on to know what happened next. We started with episode of my son shouting “I love you” in the class.

Me: Do you know dear today I received a phone call from your teacher.

Son: How come Mamma? Today I really behaved well. I didn’t trouble any of the teachers.

Me: Yes, I know that. Today she had called for something else. She mentioned that you shouted “I love you Kiyara” in front of whole class.

Son: Yes. But that was not today. 

Me: May be. But why did you shout like that in the first place?

Son: Because she is a nice girl and I like to play with her. Why what happened?

Clearly my son had not understood the gravity of this issue. He was talking very innocetly.

Me: You like to play with her. But it doesn’t mean that you can shout “I love you”

Son: Why not?? If Nobita can tell Shizuka then I can also tell Kiyara…

Clearly we could see that all this shouting business was inspired by his favorite cartoon “Doremon”. Normally before allowing my son to watch any program I used the watch couple of episodes along with him and used to permit him if and only if that show was appropriate. I had already banned couple of cartoons. But I had never imagined that apparently harmless cartoon could inspire such an action in my son. We had found the source of first complaint at least.

We had to tell our son that even if he liked playing with some girl shouting “I love you” in the class is not considered good and advised him not to repeat this behavior. 

We also told him that there is difference in Indian culture and Western culture. So even if it ok in Western culture it is not really ok in our culture. God knows how much he understood but he was at least receptive when we were taking. Thankfully he has not repeated this stunt till date. 

Banning the cartoon completely was not option. Post this fiasco we encouraged him more to watch channels like National Geographic, BBC Earth etc. Sometimes we used to watch cartoons along with him and tell him what was appropriate and what was not!!

We were relieved that at least the first incident had absolutely nothing to do with the adult content. But what about the second incident??

Categories
Parenting

Curious kids or parents at test 😲-Part 15 ( Does your kid have access to adult content??-Part 1)

Since my son had entered primary school, I had started dreading the calls from his school. Typically I used to get complaints from various teachers that he disturbs the class. One day when I saw a call from his school number I wondered what he had done that day. His class teacher had called and asked me, “Ma’am, you are working mother right?” I answered affirmatively. She said, “Do you know probably your son has access to adult content?” I was mentally prepared to hear any complaint but this. How could it be? I was speechless for few moments. If it was really true it was definitely a matter of concern for us. My son was only 6 years old. Finally I mustered the courage and asked her, “Could you please tell me exactly what makes you think that he access to adult content?” She narrated the following 3 incidents which had taken place in last couple of months:  

  1. He had shouted “I love you” in the class to one girl
  2. One boy had complained that my son was trying to kiss him
  3. One boy had complained that my son had licked his hand and he was not letting that other boy to lick his own hands.

The teacher had sought face to face meeting with both the parents. I was flabbergasted to hear all these incidents. I was very restless. I called up my husband and informed him about the whole thing. Even he was clueless. We had to talk to our son. It was a delicate job. We needed to get the answers but at the same time it was necessary to remain neutral and understand our son’s take on it. Afterall he was our son and we didn’t want him to lose his faith in his own parents.

I was not able to imagine if at all he was getting access to adult content then how and where he was getting it. He was not in a professional day care where there would be other kids and seniors. He was in charge of elderly couple and their daughter in law. We had known them for years. They had never given him access to computer or mobile. They were very vigilant. At home he had access to laptop as well as mobile. But it was under our supervision only. We didn’t have any books or CDs or anything with adult content.

Then how was he getting access?? How indeed?? My head had started spinning and I was not able to concentrate on anything in office. All these years when my kiddo was asking me all awkward questions I had never felt restless like this. For the first time I was dreading conversation with my own kid. I was really afraid of what answers I would receive. 

Me and my husband were quite  sure that our son was not having access to adult content. But then what about those incidents which his teacher had reported. Follow my next blog to get answers to the above riddles. (To be continued)

To read my other blogs visit  https://kinfolkclub.com or https://motherlab.blogspot.com